oh my god! this may be the best thing ever! i am in love with this huge huge dork!
that is right… GUITAR HERO MEETS COMMODORE 64. well, i guess to me, anything meeting commodore 64 is GOLDEN!
i wish i was smart like this!
*a small portion of my giddiness may be attributed to a work friend picking me up a caffe latte from starbucks… i was so grumpy today i had to break my no coffee rule!
so… i was GOING to go to yoga today, finally, but then keith offered the option of chinese buffet. regretfully, i chose the buffet. we did vow to never go there again anyway, due to the fact that there was nowhere to look that wasn’t depressing. it reminded me of america [or what i presume america to be having barely been there.] plus be going to a buffet is a pretty big joke because thankfully i get full in about two minutes. actually, being ‘out and about’ in langford today reminded me why i had such negative associations with it from when i lived out here in grade 10. i may have committed suicide if i had to spend grades 11 and 12 here! even as we were in the elevator back to our condo keith said ‘i just want to get out of langford and into our house!’ haha. it serves it’s purpose anyway, and generally when i go out i am pleasantly surprised at the general friendly, non-trash i come across.
in any case, i HAVE TO go to yoga on saturday. tomorrow night i have to go to my mom’s for dinner and sunday i will hopefully be hung over for the first time in quite a while, after brittani’s boyfriend’s birthday. i hate how i am starting to feel like ‘i am so fat, wah wah’ when i have been feeling generally good about myself in recent memory. i blame it on beginning to be aware of my body, as well as seeing all the perfect naked yoga ladies in the change room! in any case, it is really unfortunate, because i seem to be fairly unable to maintain good habits. i will keep trying though! even though i don’t actually control very well what i put into my body, i do think about it, which is strange in the sense that i never did at all before a year or two ago, and now i really think about it.
here are some old pictures [i just unpacked the cord.]
brother
at ferris’…s…s… goddamnit, that is one of those easy grammatical things i will always forget how to do properly and feel like an idiot for. anyway, that soup was amazing, except for it being entirely cilantro-ridden… i hate cilantro so very much. but it has these rice dumplings that were so effing good. that’s right, so good i have to be vulgar and say effing. also i love the mayo sampler you can order with the fries, three different mayos, the thai peanut one is good.
i had to capture the awesomeness of this at the metchosin farmer’s market… because i am mean.
yes, only go out on the strongest note.
the height of entertainment in the…. when is this from? 19th century?
buck 65… before the show started, just before my camera ran out of batteries! so sad.
oh, and in a good note:
Touring musician Buck 65 was ecstatic when he learned yesterday that nearly 100 hours of video footage stolen from his May 8 concert at Alix Goolden Performance Hall has been recovered.
[His manager] said she had almost given up hope the mini-DV tapes would ever be found. Then someone called the office to let her know someone had posted an ad on a Victoria buy-and-sell website for the missing footage.
That someone turned out to be post office employee Steven Sanders, who found a manila envelope filled with the concert footage beside a mailbox on the side of the highway in Colwood. Across the envelope was written “Missing Buck 65 Footage.”
Not knowing who Buck 65 was, Sanders placed the ad with his e-mail address. He also made posters with his son, which he was going to put up around the neighbourhood. Before he had a chance, Sanders got an e-mail from Buck 65’s friends.
“He e-mailed back: ‘Tell me what’s in the envelope and it’s yours,’” Persley said. She then sent him a photo of tapes similar to the stolen ones.
“When the footage was stolen, it was a huge blow against a big effort,” said Persley. “It was big money-wise. There were props, sets, lighting visual effects to create a great show so we could shoot this DVD. It was absolutely irreplaceable and invaluable.”
source: tc
i swear, they must have spent at least like… $350 dollars on that equipment. :P
i am feeling horribly guilty this week. i just haven’t had the motivation to go to yoga. it is not even as if there is anything i would rather be doing at home. i just haven’t had any energy as of yet… or i am telling myself i don’t have the energy. last night i went to bed at 9.30 with a bad headache and had nightmares. i blame this all on cutting out coffee this week as well. not really but it’s nice to have an excuse other than sheer laziness.
upon bitching about the most likely cg-riddled new indiana jones, randy sent me this genuine display.
today is the day i stop eating garbage, so to celebrate last night i ate some extra chocolate cake. also i now know how to park in a parking stall and do a three point turn. more on driving developments later!
let us be lovers well marry our fortunes together
i’ve got some real estate here in my bag
so we bought a pack of cigarettes and mrs. wagner pies
and we walked off to look for america
cathy, I said as we boarded a greyhound in pittsburgh
michigan seems like a dream to me now
it took me four days to hitchhike from saginaw
Ii’ve gone to look for america
laughing on the bus
playing games with the faces
she said the man in the gabardine suit was a spy
i said be careful his bowtie is really a camera
toss me a cigarette, i think theres one in my raincoat
we smoked the last one an hour ago
so i looked at the scenery, she read her magazine
and the moon rose over an open field
cathy, i’m lost, i said, though i knew she was sleeping
i’m empty and aching and i don’t know why
counting the cars on the new jersey turnpike
they’ve all gone to look for america
all gone to look for america
all gone to look for america
what did i say?
what i wouldn’t do for some summer fun oreos, a neon a&w hat, a canvas tent, bon echo, and about 17 years off my age. just for a day.
from malloreigh’s lj: ‘go to this website and refresh until you find five quotations that speak your truth.’ [i cheated and picked six.]
Family isn’t about whose blood you have. It’s about who you care about. -Trey Parker and Matt Stone
He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals. -Benjamin Franklin
When we were children, we used to think that when we were grown-up we would no longer be vulnerable. But to grow up is to accept vulnerability… To be alive is to be vulnerable. -Madeleine L’Engle
The creative is the place where no one else has ever been. You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you’ll discover will be wonderful. What you’ll discover will be yourself. -Alan Alda [this is one i need to work on.]
One thing I’ve learned in all these years is not to make love when you really don’t feel it; there’s probably nothing worse you can do to yourself than that. -Norman Mailer
Conscience is the inner voice that warns us somebody may be looking. -H. L. Mencken
tonight was my first night i actually enjoyed bikram’s. at no point did i have to stop and take a break, at no point did i have my ‘i hate this, i must get out of here’ discussion. i am sure it must have been the nice cool weather this evening, but let’s pretend it’s cause i’m awesome. so excited, i wish it wasn’t going to get crappily hot. i am horrible with my love/hate relationship with summer.
i am so weirdly addicted to soup [when eating out,] tonight i could not get out of dinner before yoga, but i saved most of it for lunch tomorrow. i ordered spicy beef noodle soup at the chinese place, it was really good. really, who am i?
i came across an article when signing into my hotmail just now which discussed einstein’s views on god. interesting and yet completely unsurprising.
The word God is for me nothing more than the expression and product of human weaknesses, the Bible a collection of honourable but still primitive legends which are nevertheless pretty childish. I do not believe in a personal God and I have never denied this but have expressed it clearly. If something is in me which can be called religious then it is the unbounded admiration for the structure of the world so far as our science can reveal it.
finally watched “the root of all evil?” on the weekend. i like how they throw that question mark in there for no reason. of course i enjoyed it, although not actually as much as “a brief history of disbelief.” although richard dawkins does come off a tad arrogant, i think it is completely rightfully so.
here are a few of my favourite moments [quotes from richard dawkins unless otherwise specified]:
I want to examine… the process of non-thinking called faith.
I’m a scientist and I believe there is a profound contradiction between science and religious belief. There is no well demonstrated reason to believe in God, and I think the idea of a divine creator belittles the elegant reality of the universe. The 21st century should be an age of reason, yet irrational militant faith is back on the march. Religious extremism is implicated in the world’s most bitter and unending conflicts. In Britain, even as we live in the shadow of holy terror, our government wants to restrict our freedom to criticise religion. Science we are told should not tread on the toes of theology. But why should scientists tiptoe respectfully away? The time has come for people of reason to say, enough is enough. Religious faith discourages independent thought: it’s divisive and it’s dangerous. Isn’t this the beginning of that slippery slope that leads to young men with rucksack bombs on the tube?
If you want to experience the medieval rituals of faith nobody does it better than the Catholics. At Lourdes in southern France the assault on the senses appeals to us not to think, not to doubt, not to probe. And if we can retain our faith against the evidence in the teeth of reality, the more virtuous we are.
People like to say that faith and science can live together side by side but I don’t think they can. Science is a discipline of investigation and constructive doubt, questing with logic, evidence and reason to draw conclusions. Faith by stark contrast demands a positive suspension of critical faculties. Science proceeds by setting up hypothesises, ideas, or models and then attempts to disprove them. Religion is about turning untested belief into unshakable truth through the power of institutions and the passage of time.
Faith is the great cop-out, the great excuse to evade the need to think and evaluate evidence. Faith is belief in spite of, even perhaps because of, the lack of evidence.
Ted Haggard: We fully embrace the scientific method, as American Evangelicals. And we think, as time goes along, as we discover more and more facts, that we’ll learn more and more about how God created the heavens and the earth.
RD: The scientific method clearly demonstrates that the world is four and a half billion years old. I mean, do you accept that?
Ted Haggard: Yeah, you know what you’re doing, is you are, you are accepting some of the views that are accepted in some portions of the scientific community as fact, where in, in fact, your grandchildren might listen to the tape of you saying that and laugh at you.
RD: Do you want to bet?
Ted Haggard: Sometimes it’s hard for a human being to study the ear, or study the eye, and think that happened by accident.
RD: I beg your pardon, did you say by accident?
Ted Haggard: Yeah.
RD: What do you mean, by accident?
Ted Haggard: That the eye just formed itself somehow.
RD: Who says it did?
Ted Haggard: Well, some evolutionists say it did.
RD: Not a single one that I’ve ever met.
Ted Haggard: Really.
RD: Really. You obviously know nothing about the subject of evolution.
Ted Haggard: Or maybe you haven’t met the people I have.
If God wanted to forgive our sins, why not just forgive them? Who’s God trying to impress? Presumably himself, since He is judge and jury as well as execution victim.
Oh, but of course, the story of Adam and Eve was only ever symbolic, wasn’t it? Symbolic? So Jesus had himself tortured and executed for a symbolic sin by a nonexistent individual.
We are all atheists about most of the gods that societies have ever believed in. Some of us just go one god further.
For many people, part of growing up is killing off the virus of faith with a good strong dose of rational thinking. But if an individual doesn’t succeed in shaking it off, his mind is stuck in a permanent state of infancy, and there is a real danger that he will infect the next generation.
A formative influence on my undergraduate self was the response of a respected elder statesmen of the Oxford Zoology Department when an American visitor had just publicly disproved his favourite theory. The old man strode to the front of the lecture hall, shook the American warmly by the hand and declared in ringing, emotional tones: “My dear fellow, I wish to thank you. I have been wrong these fifteen years.” And we clapped our hands red.
Steven Weinberg: Religion is an insult to human dignity. Without it, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, it takes Religion.
i know a lot of people could argue with this, and usually i would not assert my ‘opinions’ as being correct over those of others. however, i really appreciate being reminded of my true atheist nature every once in a while… otherwise i forget and drift through life weakly agnostic. why not think we are correct when all scientific fact discovered only proves us as painfully right? of course i don’t think we know everything there is to know, but i somehow doubt that the new evidence we learn will disagree with everything we have complied up until now.
i am also reading “the dragons of eden: speculations on the evolution of human intelligence” by carl sagan, which i came across at a $1 book sale last weekend. it is really excellent so far.
bikram yoga murdered me yesterday. it was pathetic. my first class during the warm weather…. [victoria seems to be getting a wet season and a dry season, and the transition occurs in the blink of an eye. i can’t believe how much i struggled. it was way harder than my first class. i hit the wall usually reserved for 75 minutes in about 60 minutes in this time. and this one i could not just rest briefly and work my way through. i lay down and every time i would get up and try to practice a posture, the overwhelming, oppressive feeling of bursting into tears and running out of the room would consume me. i know i shouldn’t let myself get defeated, but this is the first time i have seriously thought, can i make myself go back there? sigh.
keith’s parents are coming today to stay with us… i really like them but i think it will be awkward as hell! must go prepare for that.
nice work!
Don McKellar is one of the most familiar faces in Canadian cinema and television. He’s done it all and often, writing for theatre, TV and film, directing, acting and producing. His talent and hard work paid off with the news this week that Blindness, the film he wrote based on the Nobel Prize winning novel by Jose Saramago, has been chosen to open this year’s Cannes Film Festival.
i wonder if i am the only person on earth with a crush on don mckellar? no, if my days of being a dreamer, fantasizer, fan girl of many taught me anything, it’s that every celebrity you can think of has a cult of girls hopelessly devoted to them. maybe this is why i want to be famous?
attended my third class yesterday. it seems to be somehow getting more difficult. but i believe that is because i have the expectation that it should be getting easier… i mean it’s my third try and it’s not a breeze yet? since it is not getting noticeably easier, especially because i am probably pushing myself slightly harder each time, i find it a bit frustrating. all i wish for is that there is not that point 20 minutes from the end of class where i go FUCK THIS FUCKING SHIT, I CAN’T DO IT ANY MORE! I HATE THIS! NEVER COMING BACK! and i lie through a couple of postures. i am afraid i might never get too a point where i FEEL it is bearable [it obviously IS bearable in reality, because i do not die or run out of the room screaming.] if it is always this tough i don’t know if i have the self-discipline to keep going back. that is the challenge i suppose. it is really the ultimate challenge of willpower to me… obviously everyone struggles at first because it isn’t easy or comfortable. but some of my absolute most hated things in the world are heat, summertime, sweating, etc. i generally avoid these things at all cost. in any case, i have to take at least 20 classes, unless i want to waste a bunch of money… so that should give me enough time to determine whether it really is for me. my neck did not have that strange excruciatingly tight sensation after practice last night, so i must be making a little progress.
i find it amusing how even after i have cooled down, had a shower, i am pouring with sweat for hours after, even if i am cold. it feels like a clean sweat though, in a way, if that makes any sense. i am at least drinking more water than i ever have in my life so that must be a good thing. i should also mention that i feel really, really good today.
the 26 postures aka: 90 minutes of hell
i realized this time there is a clock in the room. which is not a good thing. i held off looking at it as long as i possible could, and finally peeked at 75 minutes into class… those last 15 minutes were the longest.
and i HATE that i am one of those annoying yoga people now. i never wanted to do yoga, but with always trying to keep in mind being anti-trend is just as silly as being trendy, i tried it and found it really is worthwhile. anyway, it’s not like i am forcing yoga on people but whenever i hear people complaining about sore muscles, back problems, i have to mention yoga with the intention of truly helping, because i know how frustrating it is to have chronic pain. i don’t suggest bikram to people even, but i know they must roll their eyes, like i probably would have! i am not trying to spread the gospel of yoga, i am just sick of hearing you complain about sore shoulders!
and i would LOVE to get back to being this tiny!
ah, sweet sweet 2002. actually it sorta sucked and i kinda hated myself… i was an idiot.
a while ago one of the partners mentioned the possibility of a website offering online sales. i made sure to show my obvious interest in the project. today that same partner asked me to sit in on a meeting they will be having with web developers and our crm software support company. i am not sure how this will end up, but it will be interesting to be somewhat involved in the development process, and who knows what position will be created to support the site afterwards. see bosses, i am not just a lazy apathetic piece of crap… only when it comes to things i am not interested in [aka accounting.... or rather aka most things that are not computers.]
| Search | Views |
|---|---|
| spanking audio | 3 |
| “never build a building till you’re fifty, what kind of life is that?” | 1 |
| shorty in the club | 1 |
| i am looking for perfect selfishness | 1 |
did i make a mistake naming my daughter |
1 |
people search for some funny shit. i guess if people saw what i looked up, they would also find it amusing.
“i’m gon’ make you a mix tape. do you like phil collins?”
“i have two ears and a heart, don’t i?”
i always wanted to hate 30 rock, but it can be funny. which compared to most things out there these days is pretty high praise.
friday i went to bikram again. i was on the fence as to whether to sign up for the 20 classes at 1/3 discount that is only offered when you take your second class. however this old woman who was beside me who looked like she was dying a painful death the whole class [it was her second time too] ended up committing afterwards, so that was the push i needed. i found my second class harder, but i think i may have been pushing myself harder. hopefully it starts getting more enjoyable at some point.
on saturday my brother appeared in town to surprise my mom for mother’s day. we showed up at the farmer’s market she volunteers at every week, and she was indeed very surprised. we went to ferris’ for a late lunch i had this vegetable penne chili chicken soup with rice dumplings…. so good. we walked around downtown, went to my mom’s, tried to decide what we would have for dinner until it got too late to go anywhere so we picked up a bunch of random stuff from thrifty’s and went to my place and my brother made up a plate of appetizers for us. after some drinks, cake, presents, and mario kart, my mom left around one or so and we went to sleep. then up early the next day for the metchosin farmer’s market. when i looked out the window, it looked like a warm, beautiful, sunny day. after getting dressed in a distinctly summery outfit and heading out, i discovered it was bitterly windy. we ended off with a mother’s day brunch at a pub and my brother headed out. my birthday was pretty non-existent, by the time i was done with my family it was dinner time, and my first chance all weekend to relax.
next year my birthday is not on mother’s day! will probably still be a non-event however.
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